Okay, so I was going to write a post about this before a
friend of mine had written about it yesterday! It was partially drafted and just waiting to be posted. I'll still post it, but I'll also link to her blog since we have talked a lot about how we want to be a mother that intentionally spends time with their children and finds the joy in them....even when they whine all day and throw tantrums in public that completely embarass you!
I have never really been that clean of a person. I mean, don't get me wrong, I shower and shave and do those kind of clean things. What I'm talking about is that I have never been the child who kept a spotless room or the roommate who loved to wash dishes (I will always own a dishwasher for this horrid task, I hope), or the friend who cleaned their baseboards in their room (much less the rooms of my
entire house. I have now become the person who has learned from my roommate to become obsessed with my kitchen and the counters, though, for some reason. Thanks Jen! It drives me nuts to have a messy kitchen. I mean, there are days where I feel like I clean the same pan 5 times, the floor at least a dozen, and the table and counters? Too many to count! I honestly feel like I never leave that kitchen!
With that said, I have been convicted over it lately because I have realized that I am starting to become so frustrated that my house can't stay clean past 5 minutes and I am unintentionally forgetting to play with my child intentionally. I always envisioned my stay-at-home life as one where I would be so engrossed in my child that I would forget about the housework. That was true for a long time and then it's like a switch was turned on and a day has gone by without me just simply sitting on the floor (or the couch since the floor is so low these days) and actually just playing....not minding the mess that I will have to bend over to clean up or anything else. Part of this may be to the fact that I am nearing my pregnancy and am just plain tired, but I'm not for sure. It's not an excuse, though. I don't want to be the mom that doesn't spend quality time with my child. I want to be the mommy like my mother was. GASP! Did those words actually come out of my mouth? Stop smiling, Mom! Anyway, I want to be the one who would play with us and not complain about all the work we made her do. Somehow she did it all. I swear she was wonderwoman. I wish she would share all of her secrets. Sometimes I wonder if I ever sent her to her room in tears from frustration and exhaustion. Well...I know the answer...of course not! I was an angel, but perhaps my brother did this to her!
I've been praying for lots of patience lately and have shared posts about it and am studying and memorizing verses on this. I want this to be a habit. I want it to be something that my children say is a wonderful quality about me. And of course is much needed if I am going to homeschool! If you're looking for something to pray for me about, I've given you some ideas!